Unfortunately the season finished with my beloved reds. Sticking with my 13 series of blogs and not wanting to write about the misery that was the end of the season, I thought I’d write about my 13 favourite players since I have been following them (so no Charlton, Edwards, Best or Law). As all my top 13 blogs they are not in order of preference but I think it will be clear who is actually at the top of the list.
Ryan Giggs
Most appearances ever for Man Utd. The most decorated footballer in British Football. The Welsh Wizard that we all wished was English. Ryan Giggs was the first poster child of the Fergie era and he had the skills to prove he weren’t just a pretty face. The fact that the man is still playing (he’s coming up to his 20th season in the United first team) at the highest level and was last season’s PFA player of the year shows you the character of the man. As a child I loved seeing him run at players and he scored some incredible goals. Now he has to reserve his energy but can still beat the right back with a shot of pace and his skill is still there. Just like Fergie, it will be a sad day when he finally hangs up his boots and for his achievements, nobody will ever come close.
Cristiano Ronaldo
Some people hate him but the fact is that when he was a United player he was the best in the world. I still think on his day there is nobody better. Messi has more skill more Ronaldo has more bows to his arrow. When he first joined the club he was given the No. 7 shirt, which at Old Trafford is saying that you’re something special. Beckham had left and we had signed this 19 year old Portuguese winger to take over one of the world’s best passers. His debut against Bolton showed his promise. He came off the bench and he destroyed the defence. His first couple of seasons were hit and miss. Some days he was sublime, others he would infuriate you. Then for three years (2006 – 2009) He became the main attraction at the Theatre of Dreams. He eclipsed goal scoring records in the premiership. In one season he scored 32 goals in 38 games. For a striker that would be phenomenal, but for winger, it was a different class. That same season his goal to game ratio was practically a goal a game. Unfortunately he left but I’ll never forget the impact. He may even be the most technically gifted player to ever don the famous red shirt.
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer
When United signed Solskjaer from Norwegian side Molde in 1996, I had no idea who the player was. He was signed at the same time as Yordi Cruyff (son of dutch legend Johann) and Karel Poborsky. Cruyff and Poborsky were big to me because they had played in Euro 1996 and particularly Poborsky because he had scored a fantastic goal against Portugal in that tournament and I was excited to him play for us. Of those three players Ole was the one who got a legendary status. I loved the guy from his debut when he scored a chip against Blackburn (the equalising goal in a 2-2 draw) after coming off from the bench. He did this until his retirement from the game in 2007. I loved him so much that I named a cat after him in 1998, and this was before his winner against Munich in 1999 to win the European Cup. The guy never complained about being on the bench, and whenever he played he scored and worked very hard. At Old Trafford there is a fan banner that calls him a legend and deserves that status at the Theatre of Dreams.
Gary Neville
The guy is a massive dick. He if played for any other club I would hate him, but he isn’t and he loves the club. I know when he goes onto the pitch he will give his all on the pitch and will won’t give up. He’s also the best English right back, even though he is at the end of his career. The player can still provide a great cross.
Rio Ferdinand
The guy cost 30 million and at the time I just thought he was good. He went on to become the best defender in the world from 2006 – 2009. He was unbeatable. He makes everything effortless and it takes moments of brilliance to get past him. I love Rio and he is rightfully England Captian.
Nemanja Vidic
Part of the best centre pairing in the world. He’s an old school defender that gets stuck in and he is very commanding. When he first started his United career, he looked dreadful. I thought that he was going to go to obscurity and be remembered in the same way as William Prunier. How wrong I was because the man is a rock at the back. There are rumours that Vidic will be leaving in the summer, and if that happens he will be sorely missed.
Eric Cantona
Arrogant. Cocky. Nutcase. Loose Screw. God.
I actually love the guy. I would wear my collar up for years whenever I would wear a collared shirt (even at school) . If I ever met him I would turn into a school girl meeting Marky Mark when he still had the Funky Bunch. I would kiss the man’s feet because of his genius. He came into Old Trafford and he brought trophies. We could have been playing rubbish, Eric would do one little trick and the whole team would come to life. I own three DVDs about his career, two of them I had on video. My favourite goal of his was against Sunderland in his final season. He hadn’t played well for a couple of months and scored the most audacious chip from the edge of the box and then did his arrogant pose to say ‘what else do you expect from me?’. I remember I was playing football in my back garden when my borther told me that Cantona has retired. I remember that like people remember where they were when the man landed on the moon. It was huge to me, but the man gave me so many memories. There was a poster for a Nike advertisement saying “1966 was a great year fro English football, Eric was born.” I actually think that his birth was bigger than England winning the World Cup. I really do love Eric Cantona, in my eyes he is the greatest footballer of all time.
Paul Scholes
The unsung hero. I always loved Paul Scholes. The guy never became the star that Beckham did, but he was always a better player. Even today his vision to pick out a player is second to none. Whenever you hear players talking about he best people they played against, Paul Scholes is always top of their list, which tells you how good the man is. It will be a sad day when the little ginger genius hangs up those boots.
Wayne Rooney
The star of the moment. There’s not much to say about Wazza other than he will give you his all on the pitch. I was happy when we signed him because you knew he was going to be special. This season he has become the main man (every team has one) and he has exceeded all expectations. I can see him at United for life and I think next season he will be better than the last. I can’t wait to see him back in a UNITED shirt next season (Fuck England)
Andrei Kanchelkis
Looking back I don’t think he was that great a player, but as a child he was amazing. He was lightning quick on the right wing and he scored quite a lot of goals. I loved watching him as a child and then he joined Everton for the 95-96 season, when the previous season we had lost the league. I hated him for that and I felt betrayed. I now realise that Ferige sold him because he had the next player coming through the ranks.
David Beckham
I’m not going to say much about Beckham but he was fantastic. In 1999 he was one of the best players in the world. He’s the best crosser I’ve ever seen of a ball, he took brilliant free-kicks and he would cover every blade of grass. I was sad to see him go but he went at the right time and we replaced him with Ronaldo who went on to be a much better player. He is a United legend and I also think maybe the best looking player United have ever had.
Roy Keane
Roy Keane is a scary man. On the pitch he was like a General who got involved on the front line. Every tackle was there to be one and if he didn’t win the ball then he let the player know that he was there. In his prime he was the standard bearer for how a defensive midfielder should be, Strong, quick and a good tackler. I miss his type of player
Peter Schmeichel
The greatest goalkeeper of all time. He changed the art of the position. He would always make himself as big as possible to stop the ball. I remember a game against Newcastle in 1997 at St James Park. It weren’t a great performance but it was a must win. Newcastle had two of the best strikers in the box with Sir Les Ferdinand and Alan Shearer. They threw everything at the Great Dane but he was unbeatable. A brick wall in front of the goal couldn’t have done a better job than him on that day and we won the game 1-0. He did that many times over the years and I could watch his saves for hours and never get bored. He will always be United’s number one between the sticks.
Saturday 15 May 2010
Back in the Saddle
I love music, but i thought it would be too hard to write my 13 favourite albums (it would basically be Metallica, Weezer and Alice in Chains probably) so here are my favouirte 13 albums of the last decade. I also decided to only include one album per band. Enjoy
System Of A Down – Toxicity
Would make my top 13 albums of all time. When it first came out I listened to this album all the time. I only took it out of my portable CD player to put it in my home stereo, it’s a masterpiece. Their debut album was brilliant, it was the sound of a band who came from an insane asylum. Toxicity was the sound of band that was taking that asylum sound and make it more accessible, and in that way it was better. Chop Suey is the song that took the band to the big dance, but the album doesn’t have a song that would be rated under 5 stars on a 5 star rating system. I miss this band.
Audioslave – Audioslave
Rage Against the Garden was almost a wet dream for me. I loved Soundgarden (I’ve written a blog about Chris Cornell) and my brother had really gotten me into Rage Against the Machine. I hadn’t heard a song of this aldum but I bought it straight away and was not disappointed. Cochise was pure Rage meets Garden but as songs went past they sounded more like their own band. They broke up after 3 albums and I weren’t too bothered because it has giving me back their two original bands back to the world. That’s fine with me.
Weezer – The Green Album
In the summer of 2001 I did my GCSE’s. I didn’t revise much and I didn’t do that well. There was probably two reasons why I didn’t do any revision for the biggest moment at that time:
I was told I could still go to college and do the course I wanted even if I messed up my exams.
I was too busy listening to the Green Album.
My brother got me this album and I listened to it about 5 times a day throughout the summer. Weezer are my second favourite band and this may well be my favourite albums of the band. It’s the best album under 40 minutes (that includes Slayer’s Reign in Blood) and I always visit it again in the summer. It’s my favourite thing about the summer, listening to a lot of Weezer (and my girlfriend’s birthday of course)
Metallica – Death Magnetic
My favourite band ever. I’ve written a lot of times about Metallica so I don’t need to say how great they are. Death Magnetic may be my third favourite Metallica album, and that’s a big thing to say. I got the special edition of the album, which came in a white cardboard coffin box and I think it just adds to the listening pleasure. From the classic sounding intro of This is Just your Life, to the radio friendly Cyanide and the first single The Day that Never Comes, it is a classic Metallica sounding album that spans most of the music from their career. People say that this is Kirk Hammett’s album and I think that plays down how great the rest sound on this album.
Alice In Chains – Black Gives Way To Blue
My brother likes going to concerts but he never really isn’t someone who gets animated in his excitement at going, but he was for Alice in Chains. I was excited too but you can’t forget about the big elephant in the room that the band no longer had Layne Staley on singing duties. After that concert I was amazed at how good William Duvall and had no concerns about a new album. The album is like a new era for the bad. It still has that sound but it’s seems slightly more positive (not that the band have cheered up lyric wise). I’m glad they done the album and I can’t wait for their next tour so I can hear some of these songs live.
AFI – Sing The Sorrow
I first heard AFI when I saw The Offspring live in 2000 at Wembley Arena (I hate that place) and was very impressed. I then had to wait three years for them to release new material. Their previous albums were very much punk albums in the vein of the Misfits. Sing The Sorrow was a massive direction change and it paid off big time. The fanbase deservedly grew to millions and the epic had an epic sound. People always say a band going too mainstream is a bad thing but that’s bullshit and it definitely is in the case for AFI. Love this album.
Thrice – Artist in the Ambulance
I love Thrice. They are a band that I think deserve a lot of success because they are doing something different to everybody else, yet they could only muster modest sales. That doesn’t bother me though because I think they are fantastic and Artist in the Ambulance is their finest hour to my ears. It has the mellow moments but when it was heavy, it was very heavy. Also, by buying this album, 15% of the money goes to a charity. This band doesn’t make much money, yet give a chunk of their money to charity. That’s classy.
HIM – Dark Light
I love HIM, but when this album came out I really loved them. This isn’t my favourite HIM album but when it came out I listened to it a lot and I think that merits a mention in this list. It is a really great album and it definitely got them out to a bigger market and it’s easy on the ears. Plus it has Vampire Heart, Under the Rose and Killing Loneliness, which is 3 of my favourite HIM songs.
Jack’s Mannequin – Everything in Transit
There was a band called Something Corporate, that I got into because they were compared to Weezer. They were good but they split up, and the singer, Andrew McMahon started Jack’s Mannequin and they were better. This album is all about him being dumped by his childhood sweetheart (they are now back together and happily married) It’s a really chilled out album and I love it. Not much to say really.
Blink 182 – Take Off your Pants and Jackets
I was 15 years old when this came out, I was really into Punk at the time and this album to me was really underrated at the time. The album is immature, it’s nothing groundbreaking but it’s got craft craftsmanship and it flows brilliantly. Some people are embarrassed to say they like Blink, but if Rock Show came on, they will love it! I saw them live in 2003 and I thought they were pretty rubbish.
Korn – Untouchables
This was a much hyped album in my teenage years, even I had been waiting three years for it to be released, and when it finally came out in 2002 it didn’t disappoint. To me this album is up there with the debut album. I love this album and it was well worth the wait. I saw them live later in the year and it was one of the best concerts I’ve ever been too and I loved that it concentrated on this album. I really need to listen to this album now.
Foo Fighters – In your Honour
I always liked the Foo Fighters but I never thought they had done a great album. Then when they released One by One it was very good. It had the worst songs of their career. They follow up that album with their finest moment. In your Honour to discs, one consists of the radio-friendly rock that they do better than anybody else and a second acoustic disc. Both CDs would stand up as a great album on their own, but both together make it a highlight. The Foos will make more great songs in the future but I’m convinced they’ll never top this album, and that’s not a bad thing.
Pearl Jam – Pearl Jam
Some people will tell you that Pearl Jam are currently enjoying a second wind in their career. It’s true but I would go further and say that Peal Jam’s self titled album might even be the best thing they’ve ever recorded. I love early Pearl Jam, but this album starts off with the first 5-6 songs bursting with the venom they had back in the day, and mellows out at the end to a fitting finale to a great album. It took me a long time to realise how great this band are, but I’m glad I did.
System Of A Down – Toxicity
Would make my top 13 albums of all time. When it first came out I listened to this album all the time. I only took it out of my portable CD player to put it in my home stereo, it’s a masterpiece. Their debut album was brilliant, it was the sound of a band who came from an insane asylum. Toxicity was the sound of band that was taking that asylum sound and make it more accessible, and in that way it was better. Chop Suey is the song that took the band to the big dance, but the album doesn’t have a song that would be rated under 5 stars on a 5 star rating system. I miss this band.
Audioslave – Audioslave
Rage Against the Garden was almost a wet dream for me. I loved Soundgarden (I’ve written a blog about Chris Cornell) and my brother had really gotten me into Rage Against the Machine. I hadn’t heard a song of this aldum but I bought it straight away and was not disappointed. Cochise was pure Rage meets Garden but as songs went past they sounded more like their own band. They broke up after 3 albums and I weren’t too bothered because it has giving me back their two original bands back to the world. That’s fine with me.
Weezer – The Green Album
In the summer of 2001 I did my GCSE’s. I didn’t revise much and I didn’t do that well. There was probably two reasons why I didn’t do any revision for the biggest moment at that time:
I was told I could still go to college and do the course I wanted even if I messed up my exams.
I was too busy listening to the Green Album.
My brother got me this album and I listened to it about 5 times a day throughout the summer. Weezer are my second favourite band and this may well be my favourite albums of the band. It’s the best album under 40 minutes (that includes Slayer’s Reign in Blood) and I always visit it again in the summer. It’s my favourite thing about the summer, listening to a lot of Weezer (and my girlfriend’s birthday of course)
Metallica – Death Magnetic
My favourite band ever. I’ve written a lot of times about Metallica so I don’t need to say how great they are. Death Magnetic may be my third favourite Metallica album, and that’s a big thing to say. I got the special edition of the album, which came in a white cardboard coffin box and I think it just adds to the listening pleasure. From the classic sounding intro of This is Just your Life, to the radio friendly Cyanide and the first single The Day that Never Comes, it is a classic Metallica sounding album that spans most of the music from their career. People say that this is Kirk Hammett’s album and I think that plays down how great the rest sound on this album.
Alice In Chains – Black Gives Way To Blue
My brother likes going to concerts but he never really isn’t someone who gets animated in his excitement at going, but he was for Alice in Chains. I was excited too but you can’t forget about the big elephant in the room that the band no longer had Layne Staley on singing duties. After that concert I was amazed at how good William Duvall and had no concerns about a new album. The album is like a new era for the bad. It still has that sound but it’s seems slightly more positive (not that the band have cheered up lyric wise). I’m glad they done the album and I can’t wait for their next tour so I can hear some of these songs live.
AFI – Sing The Sorrow
I first heard AFI when I saw The Offspring live in 2000 at Wembley Arena (I hate that place) and was very impressed. I then had to wait three years for them to release new material. Their previous albums were very much punk albums in the vein of the Misfits. Sing The Sorrow was a massive direction change and it paid off big time. The fanbase deservedly grew to millions and the epic had an epic sound. People always say a band going too mainstream is a bad thing but that’s bullshit and it definitely is in the case for AFI. Love this album.
Thrice – Artist in the Ambulance
I love Thrice. They are a band that I think deserve a lot of success because they are doing something different to everybody else, yet they could only muster modest sales. That doesn’t bother me though because I think they are fantastic and Artist in the Ambulance is their finest hour to my ears. It has the mellow moments but when it was heavy, it was very heavy. Also, by buying this album, 15% of the money goes to a charity. This band doesn’t make much money, yet give a chunk of their money to charity. That’s classy.
HIM – Dark Light
I love HIM, but when this album came out I really loved them. This isn’t my favourite HIM album but when it came out I listened to it a lot and I think that merits a mention in this list. It is a really great album and it definitely got them out to a bigger market and it’s easy on the ears. Plus it has Vampire Heart, Under the Rose and Killing Loneliness, which is 3 of my favourite HIM songs.
Jack’s Mannequin – Everything in Transit
There was a band called Something Corporate, that I got into because they were compared to Weezer. They were good but they split up, and the singer, Andrew McMahon started Jack’s Mannequin and they were better. This album is all about him being dumped by his childhood sweetheart (they are now back together and happily married) It’s a really chilled out album and I love it. Not much to say really.
Blink 182 – Take Off your Pants and Jackets
I was 15 years old when this came out, I was really into Punk at the time and this album to me was really underrated at the time. The album is immature, it’s nothing groundbreaking but it’s got craft craftsmanship and it flows brilliantly. Some people are embarrassed to say they like Blink, but if Rock Show came on, they will love it! I saw them live in 2003 and I thought they were pretty rubbish.
Korn – Untouchables
This was a much hyped album in my teenage years, even I had been waiting three years for it to be released, and when it finally came out in 2002 it didn’t disappoint. To me this album is up there with the debut album. I love this album and it was well worth the wait. I saw them live later in the year and it was one of the best concerts I’ve ever been too and I loved that it concentrated on this album. I really need to listen to this album now.
Foo Fighters – In your Honour
I always liked the Foo Fighters but I never thought they had done a great album. Then when they released One by One it was very good. It had the worst songs of their career. They follow up that album with their finest moment. In your Honour to discs, one consists of the radio-friendly rock that they do better than anybody else and a second acoustic disc. Both CDs would stand up as a great album on their own, but both together make it a highlight. The Foos will make more great songs in the future but I’m convinced they’ll never top this album, and that’s not a bad thing.
Pearl Jam – Pearl Jam
Some people will tell you that Pearl Jam are currently enjoying a second wind in their career. It’s true but I would go further and say that Peal Jam’s self titled album might even be the best thing they’ve ever recorded. I love early Pearl Jam, but this album starts off with the first 5-6 songs bursting with the venom they had back in the day, and mellows out at the end to a fitting finale to a great album. It took me a long time to realise how great this band are, but I’m glad I did.
The return of the 13 series
The get back on the 13 lists in 13 days, these are my favourite shows. I don’t think this needs much of an introduction. I was going to add pictures to this but that takes too long.
The Sopranos
This blog was going to be based on shows from this century, however if I did that then I would have to leave out my two favourite shows, one of which is The Sopranos. I didn’t start watching it until the third series when my brother made me watch it (it is his favourite show). After the first episode I went back and watched the rest. It is utter genius. Tony Soprano is an arsehole, he’s never going to change and like many characters in the shows listed here, you will be on his side until the end. When you want the bad guy to be ok at the end, you know it’s brilliantly written television. I couldn’t pick a favourite series because it just seemed like it was one. The thing I loved most about the show was that each little story was given time to materialise into something, sometimes it would be a couple of episodes, sometimes it was a couple of series but the payoff was always worth it. Quite possibly the greatest show of all time. It also has the greatest entrance to any show.
The Wire
Any show that has a gay black Robin Hood inspired character has to be good. The Wire is the show that every critic loves but didn’t get big viewing figures. A show that has so many characters that it can have it’s main character (McNulty) hardly be in an entire series. The show was based around the different aspects of the Baltimore Police Department. The core of the show was always with the police trying to stop the drug dealers, but it would also expand on that every time. One series would concentrate on schools, then the next would be about the newspaper, another would be an election. It had many things going on but you never felt lost. Going back to my first sentence, just like Obama, Omar was my favourite character. He started off slow, but when he was a witness in a murder trial he became the unsung hero of the show. Every time he was on the screen he stole it, and they way he died was a total shock. Plus Bubbles survived all 5 series, which to me makes it a classic.
Spaced
I remember the moment I fell in love with Spaced. It was the first episode, Tim and Daisy looking for apartments and then they both break down and then when they decide to live together, Daisy wipes dribble off her chin. This show plays to the geek inside me as it is just a parody of everything. To do that and make the show feel original is a clear sign of genius. The slow motion gun fight is one of the finest moments in sitcom history. Unlike the UK Office when they ruined it by giving it a clear ending, Spaced never did that, letting you wonder if Tim & Daisy ever got together.
The Apprentice
I like three reality shows, I’m a Celebrity, X-Factor and Britain’s Got Talent. I love The Apprentice. There is never a dull episode because Sir Alan, Nick & Margaret are always unintentionally funny. The contestants do the most bizarre things, especially when they have the worst idea in history, yet they think it is the next big thing. It probably isn’t one of my 13 favourite shows but the junior version starts tomorrow and I’m looking forward to this. A lot.
Porridge
The greatest British sitcom of all time. Ronnie Barker has perfect comedy timing and acting chops. It was so clever and the fact it was set in a prison means it should be a disaster, yet it wasn’t. My girlfriend says this show is boring but I don’t think she’s ever given it a chance. The use of language in this show was a step above everything else and the Father-Son dynamic between Barker and Richard Beckinsale was the backbone to the show. Every episode was funny but sometimes they would have moments they made you remember it is set in a prison and it can get to everyone.
The Shield
Quite possibly my favourite cop show. It wasn’t as well written or acted as The Wire but damn every episode was exciting. It follows the life of Vic Mackay and his Strike Team Police Force who are cutting corners and breaking the law to build a future for themselves. All the series follow Vic trying to keep his head above water the whole time. I was always looking forward to the ending of this show to see what outcome he would have. I thought he would be killed, but the ending that happened was probably the greatest ending of any show. Part of me always wanted to see a happy ending. Michael Chiklis was fantastic in this show.
Scrubs
Some people hate on Scrubs because it’s a sitcom that always ends with a moral to the story. Some people hate on Scrubs because it’s a sitcom that always ends with a moral to the story. I don’t care about that because the previous 20 minutes are hilarious. I like the voiceover and the day dream sequences. I also like that it’s got a bit off a throwback to classic US sitcoms while still being original. I feel the show is actually underrated as lots of people say it is generic but they are wrong.
The Office: An American Workplace
I like the original English series. They were funny and new. Then came the Christmas specials. The first was hilarious, whereas the final episode was a massive letdown. I hate that Tim & Dawn got together because I didn’t like the characters, particularly Tim. He was a knob so why would you want him to get his dream girl? I watched the American version when it was first on and I wasn’t the biggest fan of Series one, but I did love the basketball episode, which kept me interested in the second series and I’m glad I stuck with the show. The US Office is less realistic but who watches a sitcom for realism? They took the annoying parts of the UK one and just stuck to what the show does best. I also like Pam & Jim and want them to get married. I also think Dwight K. Schrute might be my hero.
Father Ted
It was ridiculous in the vein of Fawlty Towers, and with each series the ideas were insane, but it was always funny. The greatest double act in sitcom history could be Father Ted and Father Dougal. The Christmas special where they get stuck in a lingerie store with other priests is probably my favourite ever xmas episode of anything, and the episode with Richard Wilson guest starring was better than the entire run of One Foot in the Grave.
Dexter
This isn’t one of my favourite 13 shows, but I’m really looking forward to series 4 returning in a few months. It was a great premise of a show, following the life of a serial killer with a code. The first two series were fantastic, series three was only good for the interaction between Dexter and Miguel was brilliant, but there was too much fluff with the smaller storylines. However I’m very excited about the fourth series as it stars the legend that is John Lithgow (famous for Harry and the Hendersons, Cliffhanger and 3rd rock from the Sun).
Veronica Mars
I know what you’re thinking, what the fuck is this teeny bopper show doing in a list of my favourite shows? Well it’s awesome and I clearly have the taste of a 14 year old girl. I love this show and I was a fan for life from episode one. I loved it so much that I immediately went on Amazon and ordered the first series from America due to it not being available in this country. Kristen Bell is one of my favourite actresses and the fact is I usually refer to her as Veronica Mars instead of her real name. The show had a film noir feel if it was made by somebody who wanted to make the genre mainstream. When I first saw it I went into overdrive and tried to get as many people to watch it. There is no other teen show like it.
The Simpsons
My favourite show ever. I could watch The Simpsons all day, every day for a month and feel like I had a very productive month! I actually think that the episode ‘You Only Live Twice’ (Where Homer gets a new job working for Hank Scorpio, unknown to him that Hank is a bad guy) is the greatest episode of anything ever made. I love every character on the show and saying that for something like Gavin & Stacey is one thing because it has about 8 people in it, The Simpsons has 100’s of them and I love them all. He might be evil but I want to be friends with Mr Burns, if I had a child, I’d want him to have the sweetness and innocence of Ralph Wiggum. I want Ned Flanders to be my neighbour. I love this show and to the hatred of my girlfriend, she hates them boxsets but to me they are the world’s biggest cubic zircona of my collection.
I’ll admit I don’t think the series as good as it was when it first started, but I still laugh more at the show than almost anything else. The fact that the first 13 series are faultness to me shows you that I think no show can hold a candle to this.
30 Rock
Again, probably not a top 13 show for me at the moment (this top 13 list is just a fucking lie really come to think of it!) but this is the one show I want to watch the most right now. Tina Fey is the funniest person on television right now. Tracey Morgan is hilarious just playing himself. It’s got that woman who was very annoying in Ally McBeal (who wasn’t annoying in that show, but I mean the really annoying one) who is brilliant, and it has THE BALDWIN. Everybody loves THE BALDWIN and this show is perfect for him. I love this show.
The Sopranos
This blog was going to be based on shows from this century, however if I did that then I would have to leave out my two favourite shows, one of which is The Sopranos. I didn’t start watching it until the third series when my brother made me watch it (it is his favourite show). After the first episode I went back and watched the rest. It is utter genius. Tony Soprano is an arsehole, he’s never going to change and like many characters in the shows listed here, you will be on his side until the end. When you want the bad guy to be ok at the end, you know it’s brilliantly written television. I couldn’t pick a favourite series because it just seemed like it was one. The thing I loved most about the show was that each little story was given time to materialise into something, sometimes it would be a couple of episodes, sometimes it was a couple of series but the payoff was always worth it. Quite possibly the greatest show of all time. It also has the greatest entrance to any show.
The Wire
Any show that has a gay black Robin Hood inspired character has to be good. The Wire is the show that every critic loves but didn’t get big viewing figures. A show that has so many characters that it can have it’s main character (McNulty) hardly be in an entire series. The show was based around the different aspects of the Baltimore Police Department. The core of the show was always with the police trying to stop the drug dealers, but it would also expand on that every time. One series would concentrate on schools, then the next would be about the newspaper, another would be an election. It had many things going on but you never felt lost. Going back to my first sentence, just like Obama, Omar was my favourite character. He started off slow, but when he was a witness in a murder trial he became the unsung hero of the show. Every time he was on the screen he stole it, and they way he died was a total shock. Plus Bubbles survived all 5 series, which to me makes it a classic.
Spaced
I remember the moment I fell in love with Spaced. It was the first episode, Tim and Daisy looking for apartments and then they both break down and then when they decide to live together, Daisy wipes dribble off her chin. This show plays to the geek inside me as it is just a parody of everything. To do that and make the show feel original is a clear sign of genius. The slow motion gun fight is one of the finest moments in sitcom history. Unlike the UK Office when they ruined it by giving it a clear ending, Spaced never did that, letting you wonder if Tim & Daisy ever got together.
The Apprentice
I like three reality shows, I’m a Celebrity, X-Factor and Britain’s Got Talent. I love The Apprentice. There is never a dull episode because Sir Alan, Nick & Margaret are always unintentionally funny. The contestants do the most bizarre things, especially when they have the worst idea in history, yet they think it is the next big thing. It probably isn’t one of my 13 favourite shows but the junior version starts tomorrow and I’m looking forward to this. A lot.
Porridge
The greatest British sitcom of all time. Ronnie Barker has perfect comedy timing and acting chops. It was so clever and the fact it was set in a prison means it should be a disaster, yet it wasn’t. My girlfriend says this show is boring but I don’t think she’s ever given it a chance. The use of language in this show was a step above everything else and the Father-Son dynamic between Barker and Richard Beckinsale was the backbone to the show. Every episode was funny but sometimes they would have moments they made you remember it is set in a prison and it can get to everyone.
The Shield
Quite possibly my favourite cop show. It wasn’t as well written or acted as The Wire but damn every episode was exciting. It follows the life of Vic Mackay and his Strike Team Police Force who are cutting corners and breaking the law to build a future for themselves. All the series follow Vic trying to keep his head above water the whole time. I was always looking forward to the ending of this show to see what outcome he would have. I thought he would be killed, but the ending that happened was probably the greatest ending of any show. Part of me always wanted to see a happy ending. Michael Chiklis was fantastic in this show.
Scrubs
Some people hate on Scrubs because it’s a sitcom that always ends with a moral to the story. Some people hate on Scrubs because it’s a sitcom that always ends with a moral to the story. I don’t care about that because the previous 20 minutes are hilarious. I like the voiceover and the day dream sequences. I also like that it’s got a bit off a throwback to classic US sitcoms while still being original. I feel the show is actually underrated as lots of people say it is generic but they are wrong.
The Office: An American Workplace
I like the original English series. They were funny and new. Then came the Christmas specials. The first was hilarious, whereas the final episode was a massive letdown. I hate that Tim & Dawn got together because I didn’t like the characters, particularly Tim. He was a knob so why would you want him to get his dream girl? I watched the American version when it was first on and I wasn’t the biggest fan of Series one, but I did love the basketball episode, which kept me interested in the second series and I’m glad I stuck with the show. The US Office is less realistic but who watches a sitcom for realism? They took the annoying parts of the UK one and just stuck to what the show does best. I also like Pam & Jim and want them to get married. I also think Dwight K. Schrute might be my hero.
Father Ted
It was ridiculous in the vein of Fawlty Towers, and with each series the ideas were insane, but it was always funny. The greatest double act in sitcom history could be Father Ted and Father Dougal. The Christmas special where they get stuck in a lingerie store with other priests is probably my favourite ever xmas episode of anything, and the episode with Richard Wilson guest starring was better than the entire run of One Foot in the Grave.
Dexter
This isn’t one of my favourite 13 shows, but I’m really looking forward to series 4 returning in a few months. It was a great premise of a show, following the life of a serial killer with a code. The first two series were fantastic, series three was only good for the interaction between Dexter and Miguel was brilliant, but there was too much fluff with the smaller storylines. However I’m very excited about the fourth series as it stars the legend that is John Lithgow (famous for Harry and the Hendersons, Cliffhanger and 3rd rock from the Sun).
Veronica Mars
I know what you’re thinking, what the fuck is this teeny bopper show doing in a list of my favourite shows? Well it’s awesome and I clearly have the taste of a 14 year old girl. I love this show and I was a fan for life from episode one. I loved it so much that I immediately went on Amazon and ordered the first series from America due to it not being available in this country. Kristen Bell is one of my favourite actresses and the fact is I usually refer to her as Veronica Mars instead of her real name. The show had a film noir feel if it was made by somebody who wanted to make the genre mainstream. When I first saw it I went into overdrive and tried to get as many people to watch it. There is no other teen show like it.
The Simpsons
My favourite show ever. I could watch The Simpsons all day, every day for a month and feel like I had a very productive month! I actually think that the episode ‘You Only Live Twice’ (Where Homer gets a new job working for Hank Scorpio, unknown to him that Hank is a bad guy) is the greatest episode of anything ever made. I love every character on the show and saying that for something like Gavin & Stacey is one thing because it has about 8 people in it, The Simpsons has 100’s of them and I love them all. He might be evil but I want to be friends with Mr Burns, if I had a child, I’d want him to have the sweetness and innocence of Ralph Wiggum. I want Ned Flanders to be my neighbour. I love this show and to the hatred of my girlfriend, she hates them boxsets but to me they are the world’s biggest cubic zircona of my collection.
I’ll admit I don’t think the series as good as it was when it first started, but I still laugh more at the show than almost anything else. The fact that the first 13 series are faultness to me shows you that I think no show can hold a candle to this.
30 Rock
Again, probably not a top 13 show for me at the moment (this top 13 list is just a fucking lie really come to think of it!) but this is the one show I want to watch the most right now. Tina Fey is the funniest person on television right now. Tracey Morgan is hilarious just playing himself. It’s got that woman who was very annoying in Ally McBeal (who wasn’t annoying in that show, but I mean the really annoying one) who is brilliant, and it has THE BALDWIN. Everybody loves THE BALDWIN and this show is perfect for him. I love this show.
Friday 7 May 2010
Looking to the future
It's a Sunday morning at the local church and Mass is halfway through. The Priest is reading his sermon, meanwhile thinking about if he could get away with sneaky touch of the new alter boy without him getting rejected. Then the doors to the Chruch open and the Priest stops talking and is in shock. The catholics look around and can't believe it.
"Hello my children, I have returned." Says Jesus.
Nobody can believe it, almost as if they didn't believe the Bible when it said one day he would return. Jesus looks around at every person and slowly makes his way to the alter. It's so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. The Priest steps to the side as Jesus steps up to the Microphone. He has a shocked look on his face and then licks his lips before speaking. Every person is anticipating his words of wisdom.
"What the fuck is wrong with you people?" Jesus screams before breaking into a bad guy style monologue.
I decide that 2010 was my time to come back to Earth in the human form, looking to see how people celebrate my teachings and how you worship me, because i should be worshipped because i'm the son of fucking God, and do you have a statue of me helping people? No, you celebrate my life by having me crucified! The worst moment of my life and you choose that moment to be the symbol? Itell you i'm coming back and you guys think 'What image would JC like to see of himself when he returns, i know, when he's stuck to a cross for days in pain and agony for us.' Thanks a lot "my children"
"We love you Jesus" Says an elderly lady
"What the fuck is that around your neck?" Jesus asks
"A cross, to simbolise our love and dedication to you" She answers
"Oh great, because that's what i want to see my peeps wearing to respresent me. A cross, like the one i was nailed too for days and left to die. Do any of you have brains?" I mean have any of you read this book? I admit it's not a page turner like Harry Potter but this book was meant to teach people but no, you guys you it to judge people. I mean why do you hate homosexuals?
"The bible says it's immoral and wrong" The Priest answers
"Where? What page does it say i think homosexuals are wrong? I'll tell you where, it doesn't. I just wanted people to be happy but you decide to be massive homophobes. There is no gay bashing in the Bible, i've even kissed a couple of my disciples back in the day, it was no big deal!" Jesus continues "and why do you condemn prostitutes, i clearly love me some ladies of the night and you make them feel like they are doing something wrong when the fact of the matter is after this gig the J-dogg is gonna go and pick himself up a lady to do some freaky shit with"
"You are not the son of a God, you were sent here by the devil" shouts a man in a suit.
"JESUS FUCKIN' CHRIST! Are you kidding me? how dare you insult me. You have sinned in my house and i'm in a vengeful mood."
Jesus walks down from the alter and goes to the man and snaps his neck.
"Haven't you watched The Wire? You disrespect me in a house built for me in front of my people then you must die! Don't you know who i am? Don't you know who my Father is? He created the Earth and you speak down to his son? I can't stay on this Earth, i'm going back to Heaven, away from you people. Oh and don't worry, i may have killed that sinner, but i have a endless collection of get into Heaven free cards. One final message though, if you want to get invited to the big dance, you gotta make some changes!
Jesus then pulls out a .45 magnum, "This is how i should have been sacrificed" then he shoots himself in the head and vanishes in a light.
I'm thinking about doing this writing course and need to enter a piece for it and wanted to know if i could think of something to write of the top off my head. I think it needs a lot of work but maybe this has some potential
"Hello my children, I have returned." Says Jesus.
Nobody can believe it, almost as if they didn't believe the Bible when it said one day he would return. Jesus looks around at every person and slowly makes his way to the alter. It's so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. The Priest steps to the side as Jesus steps up to the Microphone. He has a shocked look on his face and then licks his lips before speaking. Every person is anticipating his words of wisdom.
"What the fuck is wrong with you people?" Jesus screams before breaking into a bad guy style monologue.
I decide that 2010 was my time to come back to Earth in the human form, looking to see how people celebrate my teachings and how you worship me, because i should be worshipped because i'm the son of fucking God, and do you have a statue of me helping people? No, you celebrate my life by having me crucified! The worst moment of my life and you choose that moment to be the symbol? Itell you i'm coming back and you guys think 'What image would JC like to see of himself when he returns, i know, when he's stuck to a cross for days in pain and agony for us.' Thanks a lot "my children"
"We love you Jesus" Says an elderly lady
"What the fuck is that around your neck?" Jesus asks
"A cross, to simbolise our love and dedication to you" She answers
"Oh great, because that's what i want to see my peeps wearing to respresent me. A cross, like the one i was nailed too for days and left to die. Do any of you have brains?" I mean have any of you read this book? I admit it's not a page turner like Harry Potter but this book was meant to teach people but no, you guys you it to judge people. I mean why do you hate homosexuals?
"The bible says it's immoral and wrong" The Priest answers
"Where? What page does it say i think homosexuals are wrong? I'll tell you where, it doesn't. I just wanted people to be happy but you decide to be massive homophobes. There is no gay bashing in the Bible, i've even kissed a couple of my disciples back in the day, it was no big deal!" Jesus continues "and why do you condemn prostitutes, i clearly love me some ladies of the night and you make them feel like they are doing something wrong when the fact of the matter is after this gig the J-dogg is gonna go and pick himself up a lady to do some freaky shit with"
"You are not the son of a God, you were sent here by the devil" shouts a man in a suit.
"JESUS FUCKIN' CHRIST! Are you kidding me? how dare you insult me. You have sinned in my house and i'm in a vengeful mood."
Jesus walks down from the alter and goes to the man and snaps his neck.
"Haven't you watched The Wire? You disrespect me in a house built for me in front of my people then you must die! Don't you know who i am? Don't you know who my Father is? He created the Earth and you speak down to his son? I can't stay on this Earth, i'm going back to Heaven, away from you people. Oh and don't worry, i may have killed that sinner, but i have a endless collection of get into Heaven free cards. One final message though, if you want to get invited to the big dance, you gotta make some changes!
Jesus then pulls out a .45 magnum, "This is how i should have been sacrificed" then he shoots himself in the head and vanishes in a light.
I'm thinking about doing this writing course and need to enter a piece for it and wanted to know if i could think of something to write of the top off my head. I think it needs a lot of work but maybe this has some potential
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